[Hook]
Fuck this pulse still beating in my chest
Fuck this air I’m forced to ingest
Fuck this clock that won’t let me rest
I’m screaming fuck this till nothing is left
[Verse 1]
I count the cracks in the ceiling like rosary beads
Each fracture a memory I never agreed
To keep, to hold, to swallow with teeth
Grinding glass into dust that I breathe
My shadow got heavier than lead in my veins
It drags concrete boots through the puddles of shame
I smile for the camera, perfect decay
White teeth hiding tongues that forgot how to pray
[Pre-Hook]
Somebody turn the volume down on existing
I’m tired of the static, tired of resisting
[Hook]
Fuck this pulse still beating in my chest
Fuck this air I’m forced to ingest
Fuck this clock that won’t let me rest
I’m screaming fuck this till nothing is left
[Verse 2]
I sold my future for a handful of nights
That tasted like copper and fluorescent lights
Now the mirror shows a debtor with hollowed out eyes
Collecting interest on every goodbye
My heartbeat’s a landlord evicting my soul
Late fees in blood, final notice in full
I tried to ghost myself but the lease won’t dissolve
Still stuck paying rent on a body I loathe
[Bridge]
I don’t want peace
I want the absence of war inside my skull
I don’t want hope
I want the silence after the fall
[Hook]
Fuck this pulse still beating in my chest
Fuck this air I’m forced to ingest
Fuck this clock that won’t let me rest
I’m screaming fuck this till nothing is left
[Verse 3]
I swallowed the sun just to burn from within
Now every exhale is a funeral hymn
My ribcage a cage for a bird made of sin
Wings clipped by choices I can’t un-begin
I tattooed escape plans across both my arms
But the ink bled out with the self-inflicted harm
Now the map is ruined, directions dissolved
Still walking in circles that never evolve
[Outro Hook]
Fuck this pulse… fuck this breath…
Fuck this clock… fuck this death
That won’t come collect what it’s owed
I’m screaming fuck this
Till the scream corrodes
[Final whisper, dry]
Fuck this.